Monday, March 16, 2015
When you are invited somewhere that you don't want to go, what do you do? Do you politely decline, do you think of an excuse, or do you just flat-out lie?
I think that most people feel a little stressed when they are asked to do something that they have no interest in. There are several reasons we may feel this stress. Some feel it because they don't want to hurt other people's feelings. Some because they are a people pleaser, and some because they fear that people will judge them or look down on them.
Whatever the reason for the stress, people (myself included) really need to learn to say no sometimes. I know that I tend to try to make excuses when I don't want to go somewhere. I try to make sure that they are legitimate, so that I am not lying, but it would still be better if I just said, "No thanks. I think I'll pass this time". There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, and yet for whatever reason, most of us feel like we owe people more than that. Like somehow us making excuses is better than being straightforward...backwards much?
I know I am guilty of this sometimes, and I know my friends have mentioned that they struggle in the same way.
So today, I encourage us all to choose to just say "no" instead of making up random excuses, or even lying (please don't do that). If someone is really our friend, they will not get mad at us for choosing to opt-out on certain events.
And like-wise, don't make your friends feel guilty if they give you a "no". Don't you want to feel like you don't owe anyone an excuse? Well, let your friends have that right too. Trust them. It's only fair.
I'm not really sure why so many people have an issue with this, but it really is a problem. Let's do our best to correct this bad habit!