I've always had a strange dichotomy happening in my life.... one of my deepest passions in life is helping pre-teen and teenage girls recognize their worth in Christ, and yet most of the time, I forget my own worth.
I guess we all do that to some degree. We forget we are chosen by a royal King. We forget the price that was paid for us. We forget that we are beautiful, and we forget that it doesn't matter what other people think.
So for those days- those far-too-common days- we need reminders of who we are and why we are so special.
For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.
Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.
The Lord appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.
1 Peter 3:3-4
God didn't create us to hide away, live in a self-conscious state, or value what people think of us more than we value ourselves. Unfortunately, most women- most everyone- has that backwards.
We tend to only feel confident when we have layers of make-up on and even then, it's debatable whether or not we are confident (no, I'm not anti-makeup). We put ourselves down in a facade of humility, but it's really just self-hate.
Many women seek out the attention of a man to feel beautiful, and she will remain with that man even if he doesn't value her or treat her correctly. His "approval" of her trumps her self-worth.
This breaks my heart. When I was in middle school, I fell into this trap. I dated a much older guy because I liked that he paid me attention. But when it came down to it, he didn't care about me. He flirted with other girls and dumped me as soon as he got attention from other girls. When they were done with him, he came back, and I let him. This was my fault just as much as it was his, because I wasn't cherishing myself; I was cherishing what he thought of me.
At that time in my life, I was devaluing myself to the point that I was letting a boy treat me however he wanted to, simply so I could feel desired. That is what most girls do, sadly.
As I look at my husband-someone who values me, cherishes me, and wants to see me grow in Christ- I am so thankful that God brought me to a better understanding of my worth. I would have made a lot of bad decisions, had God not revealed it to me. Many women live their entire lives undervaluing themselves. They never get out of that bad relationship, they never stop starving themselves, and they never stop hiding behind their clothes and makeup. My understanding of my worth in Christ is still flawed, but it is much better than it used to be. And my hope is that other women and teens alike will come to a place of understanding this.
I hope that they will refuse to base their worth on their body types, the opinions of others, or the attention of a man. I pray that their worth will come from Christ and from the truths of the bible.
*A quick side-note: Ladies, always forgive anyone who has hurt you. Part of realizing your worth comes from knowing you are forgiven. Being forgiven allows us (and requires us) to forgive others as Christ forgave us. I have long-since forgiven the guy who devalued me and have no hard feelings what-so-ever. If you've been in a similar situation, I would encourage you to do the same.
What steps can we all take to realize our worth...and believe it?
This post is also linked-up here: