Self-Worth

Friday, April 17, 2015


I've always had a strange dichotomy happening in my life.... one of my deepest passions in life is helping pre-teen and teenage girls recognize their worth in Christ, and yet most of the time, I forget my own worth.

I guess we all do that to some degree. We forget we are chosen by a royal King. We forget the price that was paid for us. We forget that we are beautiful, and we forget that it doesn't matter what other people think.



So for those days- those far-too-common days- we need reminders of who we are and why we are so special.


Psalm 139:13-15 
For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.


Luke 12:6-7 
Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? And not one of them is forgotten before God. Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.


Jeremiah 31:3 
The Lord appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you.


John 3:17 
For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.

1 Peter 3:3-4 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

God didn't create us to hide away, live in a self-conscious state, or value what people think of us more than we value ourselves. Unfortunately, most women- most everyone- has that backwards.


We tend to only feel confident when we have layers of make-up on and even then, it's debatable whether or not we are confident (no, I'm not anti-makeup). We put ourselves down in a facade of humility, but it's really just self-hate.

Many women seek out the attention of a man to feel beautiful, and she will remain with that man even if he doesn't value her or treat her correctly. His "approval" of her trumps her self-worth.

This breaks my heart. When I was in middle school, I fell into this trap. I dated a much older guy because I liked that he paid me attention. But when it came down to it, he didn't care about me. He flirted with other girls and dumped me as soon as he got attention from other girls. When they were done with him, he came back, and I let him. This was my fault just as much as it was his, because I wasn't cherishing myself; I was cherishing what he thought of me.

At that time in my life, I was devaluing myself to the point that I was letting a boy treat me however he wanted to, simply so I could feel desired. That is what most girls do, sadly.

As I look at my husband-someone who values me, cherishes me, and wants to see me grow in Christ- I am so thankful that God brought me to a better understanding of my worth. I would have made a lot of bad decisions, had God not revealed it to me. Many women live their entire lives undervaluing themselves. They never get out of that bad relationship, they never stop starving themselves, and they never stop hiding behind their clothes and makeup. My understanding of my worth in Christ is still flawed, but it is much better than it used to be. And my hope is that other women and teens alike will come to a place of understanding this.

I hope that they will refuse to base their worth on their body types, the opinions of others, or the attention of a man. I pray that their worth will come from Christ and from the truths of the bible.

*A quick side-note: Ladies, always forgive anyone who has hurt you. Part of realizing your worth comes from knowing you are forgiven. Being forgiven allows us (and requires us) to forgive others as Christ forgave us. I have long-since forgiven the guy who devalued me and have no hard feelings what-so-ever.  If you've been in a similar situation, I would encourage you to do the same.

What steps can we all take to realize our worth...and believe it?



This post is also linked-up here:

Faith and Fellowship Blog Hop


and here





11 comments

  1. I love this post Kristin! Thank you so much for these reminders. I remember falling into that trap in MS and HS too! :( I love how you said to always forgive people in your past. It took me a really long time to truly forgive myself and others for the mistakes I had made, but I did. I read the book Enemies of the Heart by Andy Stanley. It really helped me let go.

    I needed to hear this truth today. <3

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    1. I'm so thankful this helped you! That's the goal <3

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  2. Thank you for sharing this. It is a wonderful reminder, especially in today's world where everyone is finding their worth in earthly things. All we need is in him.

    www.racheldinh.com

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  3. Oh my goodness, I love this so much. I am on a weight loss journey, and I always thought that I would be so much happier and liked by more people if I could just lose the weight. Well, I've lost almost sixty pounds, and I am definitely happier and more confident, but I had to learn to love myself, even at my heaviest. Sure, losing the weight was awesome, but it wasn't about that; it was about seeing that I am awesome, no matter my size or how many people like me. I am so grateful that God is patient with us as we learn these sweet lessons.

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    1. Maegan, I am so blessed by your comment! I am so glad you have been learning this lesson too! I am glad my words were an encouragement and I too am thankful for God's patience and grace!

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  4. Thank you so much for sharing at Waiting on...Wednesday! It's a vicious cycle that most of us go through. By fully surrending, we have the joy of the Lord - why do we make it so hard?! You've given me lots to think about today - thank you!

    Holly
    www.iwillservewhileiwait.blogspot.com

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    1. Thanks for hosting the link-up!
      And thank you so much for stopping by!

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  5. Wow, Kristin, what a beautiful post to read first thing in the morning. I found a lot of wisdom and comfort in your words and the biblical excerpts you included.

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    1. Thank you, Lindsay! I am so glad it was encouraging to you! :)

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  6. I had some pretty similar expereinces when I was younger and now it's amazing to know my husband sees my worth...and that it really doesn't matter to me any more. I enjoy that he values and cherishes me, but even if he didn't...I would be okay because the King of Kings does and that's such a beautiful gift.

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    1. Yes! Exactly! I am so glad you understand that, Lauren!

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