Wednesday, December 17, 2014

Do you ever feel like its hard to hear God's voice? Like maybe you are the only Christian in the world who can't decide if God is directly speaking to you, or if your own brain is speaking for him?

It makes you feel a little crazy, doesn't it. We know that God can speak to us, but we don't want to assume everything we hear or feel is from him, because we know that Satan is a great deceiver....

I feel like this a lot, because I have always wanted  to be one of those people who hear everything from God. They ask him where they should go to lunch, they feel or hear him say where to go, and they end up leading someone to Christ while they are there... I have not really had an experience like that. I'd like to, but I also know that God doesn't speak to everyone in the same way.

I am an emotional person. I feel a lot of different things all at once and I think on multiple subjects and contemplate deeply on them one after the other. A lot of the time, my emotions are sporadic and unpredictable. I'll feel really excited about something, and the next minute I'll be in remorse because I remember that one girl I treated poorly three years ago, and I start to feel sick to my stomach for not being Christ-like. I will then feel like a horrible Christian and think on all my faults for a few minutes, until I'm somehow back to thinking about the thing I was excited about in the first place. It is a constant roller-coaster.

That being said, many times the voices I hear in my head, or the emotions I feel, can be very misleading. I'll feel like I am sinning, simply because I feel guilty; not because there is any reason to think what I'm doing is a sin...but simply because I feel like I've done something wrong.

My husband is constantly reminding me of two things: 1.) We are free in Christ; we are not meant to live a life of condemnation, constantly fearing we will miss something that God is saying, and 2.) The Bible is the voice of God. If we are unsure about the things we hear in our head or feel, we can always count on God's Holy Scripture to be from him, and to be truth.

I am thankful for this. If the only way God spoke was through feelings, I'd be in trouble. I'd never know if God was telling me to do something, or if I was just projecting my own thoughts onto God.
I don't want to do that.

Now, this doesn't mean I think it is impossible for God to speak to me. It just means I have to be careful. I must compare the things I think and feel to the word of God. I can't just say, "Oh, I know what I felt was from God!", because with the way my brain functions, it may not be.
I spent five years feeling like God was telling me I wasn't saved. I wanted to be saved and I wanted to live for God, and yet from 9th grade to freshman year of college, I had to fight constant feelings that God was telling me I wasn't saved and that I didn't have enough faith. Everyone except me could see that that was a lie from Satan. Meanwhile, I still thought it was God speaking to me.

And that is exactly what I mean when I say that I cannot trust what I feel. Some people may hear God load and clear. I envy them. However, I am thankful that my feelings do not dictate truth. And I am thankful that I have a husband, and a mom, and friends who remind me of that when I let my mind run wild.

If anyone reading this is like me, I would challenge you to test what you feel, and what your mind tells you, against the Bible. Look at the evidence of the situation and compare it to what the bible says. Satan can make us feel guilty about a lot of things, or make us feel like we are living rightly when we aren't. He can falsely tear us down, but he can also falsely build us up. God's word can help us see if we are being convicted by God, or torn down and condemned by Satan. They are two different things, and yet we often get them confused. Likewise, God's word can help us see if God is building us up, or if Satan is giving us a false representation of our "righteousness".

My prayer for all of us is that we will gain a clearer hearing of God's voice and leading, but also, that when we can't hear, we will trust God's word, and trust the evidence in our lives that shows us where to go.

So grab a cup of coffee, or tea if you must ;) and pray with me.

Father God in Heaven,
Be with us. Forgive our fear and our distrust. Forgive the hopeless feeling that we will never hear you clearly. Help us trust you. Help us wait on you. Help us have a better sense of your voice and more clearly hear when you are speaking to us. Help us to hear your voice in a way that we know it distinctly from any other voice, and that we will always obey you because we love you.
Your sheep know your voice, God in Heaven. Help us to know it. We need your help in that. You are our Shepherd, but sometimes we can't hear clearly. Forgive us and help us.
Please help us not to twist, misinterpret, or misapply anything, thinking that something is you, your voice, your truth, or something you are saying that isn't, or vice versa, God in Heaven.
Help us know the truth, not believe lies, and know and recognize the difference, and believe, accept, live and obey accordingly, God in Heaven.
Help us to see where we have maybe been believing wrongly for a long time. Reveal that to us and help us to really, truly know it, and with your help, help us correct it, God in Heaven.
Show us truth, show us evidences that let us know whats from you and what isn't. Help us with our confusions and help us recognize lies and wrong-thinking and throw them out the window forever. Help us not to and forgive us for picking up what we've already laid at your feet.
Help us with all of this and do all this for us in every way, shape and form, in all things and at all times, with anything and everything specific that we struggle with, in all those ways God in Heaven, and with anything and everything else in life as well too please, God in Heaven, in all those ways.
Do all this for us and help us with all this in all things, at all times, and in every way, always and no matter what, God in Heaven, and help us trust you fully for all of that.
Please also be with all the prayer requests and help everyone in need and in trouble or in any emergency or struggle, God in Heaven. Take care of all that I always ask, pray, have on my heart and mind, and desire for you to help me with and do for me, God in Heaven, all in general, all specifically and including all of the "includings", both new, old and added on, God in Heaven.
And please help us to know and do your will and glorify you in all we say and do, at all times, Father God in Heaven and forgive our sins and purify us continuously. For all against you, all our specific troubles and for all we need, forgive us, help us, heal us, correct us and purify us continuously in every way, God in Heaven.
I take every thought and everything captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ, God in Heaven. Help me to fully.
I ask and pray all these things in Jesus' name, with faith in you, God in Heaven, in and through the faith and trust I've asked you to continuously fill me with, of and to you alone always, God in Heaven, thank you, amen.

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