That Time I Didn't Care What Others Thought

If you follow me on Instagram, you probably know that I finally made it to the beach! Can I get a "woot woot!"?

This trip was so needed. I appreciated the time to unwind, but I mostly just wanted to see my friends and lay on that beautiful beach all day. I wanted the salt air and sea, and I wanted to smell tanning oil and sunscreen all day. Honestly, I was desperate for water, sunshine, and some of my favorite people. Praise the Lord I got all three of those for a glorious four days!

I Usually Care

As much as I'd like to be able to say otherwise, I am a very self-conscious person. I always have been. But since I'm extremely overweight now, I also worry about being your "typical fat girl". You know the ones: they are the girls that people cringe at when they see them in a bathing suit. They are the ones that even the most good-hearted people judge and criticize. I feel like that girl fairly often, but I feel it even more at the beach.

But something really awesome happened on this trip.

The first day I was there, I spent the first few hours of beach time by myself before my friend met up with me. There were fairly deep tidal pools right beside my beach chair, so I decided to get in the pools. I took selfies in the pools, floated in them, and straight-up laid down in those suckers. If I am being honest, I probably looked like a beached whale (seriously). But to my surprise, I didn't care! Sure, I was still self-conscious, and it gnawed at me a little, but not enough to make me stop.

I stayed in the tidal pools as long as I wanted and I did my own thing. I didn't care (very much) if people thought I looked silly, fat, or stupid. I was relaxing, having fun, and enjoying my vacation.

Progress

Friend, that day, I impressed myself a little. I had allowed myself not to care what others thought. Even though I was still worried and self-conscious, the fact that I pushed through and continued doing what I was doing was proof enough that I didn't really care what others thought. If I did, I would have stopped, cowered up to my chair, and tried to make myself small.

In that moment, I didn't do that.

And we really don't have to do that, you know. We don't have to try to hide in order to cover up our imperfections. We are beautiful regardless of what we look like. I hate my weight and am trying to lose it, but I am still beautiful right now.

And so are you!

It's Totally Ok

Whether you are over-weight, feel like a beanpole with no curves, hate your skin, or have a high, squeaky voice, you are beautiful. You don't have to care so much what others think.

It's ok to lay in a tidal pool even if you feel like a beached-whale.

It's ok to wear a dress that was made for curvy people. If you like it, wear it.

It's ok to go make-up free- even if you have bad acne.

It's ok to speak up, make conversation, and sing loud, even if your voice is higher (or lower) than most.

These things may be "imperfections", but you, wonderful lady, are beautiful. You don't have to hide away because someone might think negatively of you.

I could have missed out on a very fun piece of my beach trip. I could have decided to let what others might think affect the way I enjoyed my day. But I didn't. I had a wonderful time and I don't regret it.

And that was the time I didn't care what others thought.

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Make Time for You: Mug-spiration Monday

We all have those weeks. The one's where you never feel like you actually catch your breath. The one's where you are lucky to get any sort of balanced nutrition, and you live off last week's sleep. Thankfully, those don't usually happen to me now, but I used to have them all the time.

So what can you do to take care of yourself during these sorts of weeks? How can you make yourself a priority, have some "you time", and still get everything done?

I get it. How can you possibly schedule "you time", when you don't even have time to breathe? Well, I believe that you can find a way to schedule 30 minutes of "you time" in any busy day.

Some of you may be able to just decide that at 3:30 (or whenever) you are going to go watch fuzzy cat videos for 30 minutes. Others may have to ask their hubby to watch the kids before you go insane. But what about if there is no help in the picture? What if you are going constantly from the time your feet hit the floor to the time your head hits the pillow again in the evening? In that case, I have a few ideas for how you can still make "you time" happen.

Get Up Early (or go to bed late)

You probably feel like you can't possibly give up any more sleep. But unless you are already missing an unhealthy amount of sleep, I think that you need to make the time.

Doing things you love is important. If I didn't make time for blogging, I'd be missing an important part of me. And I'm guessing that there is something you love that you need in your life.

Maybe you love to blog like I do. Maybe you love crocheting, painting, or singing. Or maybe you just feel so much better when you take a bubble bath. Whatever it is, you are important enough to make time for something that is important to you. You matter enough to carve out part of your day for you.
And if that requires getting up 30 minutes earlier, or going to bed 30 minutes later, then you need to do that. You will adjust, and I am guessing you'll be very glad that you made that change!

Ask a Friend

Are you a parent who gives all of your time to your kids? Are you a workaholic who spends nearly every hour at the office? Are you a people pleaser who can't say no to helping other people?

Hey, I'm glad you give a lot of time to your kids. I'm glad you are a hard worker. And praise God that you love to help people! Those are all good things- in moderation. They cease to be good things when you neglect the rest of your life- your spouse, your friends, or yourself.

So if you find yourself putting off "you time", ask a trusted friend to keep you accountable. Ask them to text you and remind you that you need to make the time. Ask them to be tough on you, if that's what you need.

Take Little Breaks

As a last resort, if nothing else will work for you, then just take little sanity breaks here and there. If you absolutely can't get away from work at a decent time, then take a few extra bathroom breaks throughout the day and sit and breathe in the bathroom. Sounds silly, but if that's the biggest escape you get in your day, then you need to do that. I had to do that when I worked at a grocery store Starbucks. I was miserable there and the bathroom was a beautiful place during that time. Do what you have to do.

Or if you have no help with the kids, and money is tight, find a discount grocery store to shop at and use the extra money you save to hire a babysitter a couple times a month. If you don't have a sitter but are skeptical of babysitting websites, then call local churches and see if they have any trusted members that do babysitting work. Make it clear that you have high expectations and see if they can help you find someone.


Ultimately, only you can decide that you are important. Only you can give yourself some time, and only you can make the decision to treat yourself well.
I get that we are all in different walks of life, and I have no idea what your particular situation is, but I still believe you need some time for you, or one day, you are going to break. You might last for a while, but sooner or later, you are going to burn out. You need to start seeing yourself as valuable, and treat yourself that way too.

So today, decide to make yourself important. Work on it throughout the week, no matter what else you've got going on.

You are important.