The Peculiar Treasure: godly women

I originally wrote this post as a guest post for my friend Kristie's blog. Now I'm sharing it with you. You should definitely go check out her website :)

Anger gets a bad rap sometimes. Anger is to blame for unkind words, huge fights, and even violent crimes. Anger does lead to those things, if it isn't kept in check. It can cause a lot of problems. But anger is not only natural, but it is unavoidable- sometimes, it is even good!

There is such a thing as godly anger. Godly anger is anger towards the things that break God's heart. It's anger towards bullying, injustice, and cruelty. You aren't necessarily in the wrong just because you are angry. What is wrong, however, is letting your anger make you cruel. You can be angry, but still be kind. You cannot, however, be cruel and still be kind.

Cruelty

Cruelty comes when we feel we have a right to be hateful because someone has wronged us. Cruelty can be as brazen as murdering someone to pay them back for their wrongs, or it can be as small as personally attacking your husband because he didn't clean the house like he promised.

We tend to feel that we deserve justice for every wrong committed against us. But God says justice belongs to Him (Romans 12:19). We are not to become cruel in order to get what we feel we deserve.

Cruelty says, "God isn't in charge- I'm in charge". Cruelty says "I don't care how I make this person feel. I want to hurt them, because they hurt me". Cruelty says, "I am the most important person around. How dare anyone hurt me".
Cruelty has a way of turning us into selfish monsters who forget that we make mistakes too.

Turn It Around

It may sound cliche, but turn the situation around. How would you feel if people were cruel every time you made a mistake? What if they gave no grace? Maybe you didn't mean to do wrong- maybe you were truly sorry. Regardless though, if no one showed you love and grace when you did wrong, you wouldn't think it was fair. You'd expect them to change their tune a bit, wouldn't you? I know I would! And that's because there is something inside all of us that tells us that grace needs to be a part of our lives. We know that without grace, we would be lost. And so when we do wrong, we hope and long for people to forgive us, let it go, and give us another chance.

Channel Your Anger

So what do we do when someone does make us angry? How to we handle it in a way that pleases God, but also solves the problem?

I believe that the answer lies in real, solid communication. First of all, communicate with God. Ask Him to help you forgive the wrong. It may even be necessary to ask that He help you want to forgive the wrong! I've been there many times!

After giving the issue to God, we should communicate with the person who has made us angry. Sometimes, this won't be feasible- like when we are mad because a random person flipped us off in traffic, or when the person we are angry at has passed away. But most of the time, we still have the opportunity to talk it out (calmly and kindly). And that is what I believe we should do.

It Doesn't Matter...Kind Of

You wanna know a secret though? Sometimes, that conversation won't go well. Sometimes that person will be rude to us about our honesty. Sometimes, they'll storm off. Sometimes, they will say they hear us and will do better, but then they won't actually make the effort.

As frustrating as that is (and I'm still learning this myself), it doesn't really matter what their response is. Our responsibility is us, not them. As long as we are honest, real, and kind, without a hint of cruelty, we've done our part. We've done what's right.

So next time someone makes you angry, don't beat yourself up over your anger. Anger isn't wrong in and of itself in most cases. Instead, be very aware of how you channel that anger, and avoid cruelty like the plague.

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Earlier this week we celebrated International Women's Day. Honestly, I've never heard of that holiday before, and I have no idea when it started. I've never been into celebrating all these new holidays that keep appearing out of thin air (unless they involve coffee, french fries, or burgers, haha). But I do think that women are worth celebrating.

There are so many powerful women these days- women that I would love to learn from and emulate, but honestly, my definition of a woman worth celebrating is far different from what most people would think of.

The Strength of a Grandmother

When I think of a strong, inspirational woman, I think of my Nana.

My Nana grew up in a very low-income situation. Many of us will never experience the level of financial hardship that she did as a child/teenager.

When my Nana married my grandpa, she was very young. 16 years old. Not long after getting married, she got pregnant with my mom. A couple years later, she had my uncle, but by 23 couldn't have anymore children because of some serious health problems that continued to linger.

But despite those setbacks, Nana ended up creating her own interior design business from the ground-up. She built up an excellent reputation as a skilled, honest worker and business owner. And she continued to run her own business until she was in her mid-60's.

My Nana worked harder than most people I know. She made sure that people were happy with the work she had done, she worked long hours, she always looked beautiful and perfectly put together, and she always sought to put God first and show His love to others.

The Stroke

Two years ago, however, on October 12th, 2013, my Nana had a stroke. She was paralyzed on her entire right side, she couldn't talk, and she had to eat through a feeding tube.

All of us were in shock. This resilient, hard-working, wonderful woman was all of a sudden unable to talk, walk, or eat. Our hearts broke for her as she had to work through all of this.

Inspiration At Its Finest

But you know what? My Nana worked through it all with grace. As soon as she was able, she got therapy (speech and physical). She worked on talking, on moving her hands and feet, and she was able to get off the feeding tube.

She went from liquids, to soft solids, to being able to eat most of her favorite foods again.

She went from not being able to move any of the right side of her body, to being able to move her fingers, move her foot, and walk short distances with a walker.

My Nana can talk on the phone now. It's hard for her to talk, and it wears her out after a long-day, but I can pretty much talk to my Nana like I always have.

A True Role Model

God gets the ultimate glory for all of this progress. It's His doing. But it's also super important to me that people understand how hard my Nana has continued to work.

Despite the rigorous rehab, despite a struggle against depression, despite the fact that almost no one from her church of 20 years has come to visit her or check on her, my Nana has persevered. My Nana has continued to read her Bible, pray, have faith, and trust God. It hasn't been easy for her, but I absolutely know, beyond a shadow of the doubt, that my Nana has handled this better than most people (including myself) would. She is one of the single most amazing women I know, and she is an inspiration to me spiritually, emotionally, and in her work ethic.

My Nana has always loved me with a deep, wonderful love that no one could miss, and she still does. She means the world to me.

When I think of a strong, inspirational woman, she's it! I don't need to look to a celebrity, or a lady in power. I only need to look to my Nana. She is a far better inspiration than anyone the world could suggest to me!

Want to read more posts about women who inspire, encourage, and make a huge difference in the world? Check out the posts below!